The Worst Of M.C. Hammer, ep. 3: “Get 2 No U”
Continuing with M.C. Hammer’s “Worst of the Best” month, I’d like to introduce ‘Get2NOU’.The discovery of this song is actually the song that started the search for all other bad songs M.C. Hammer songs. Keep in that in mind while you watch and listen.
For all the things that M.C. Hammer has ever been (dancer, rapper, entertainer, etc.), he has never been a sex symbol. At least I can’t remember him ever being considered one. “GET2NOU,” I think, is his attempt at getting his LL Cool Hammer on…and to the delight of all who are watching, he fails miserably. He’s not alone though. He’s never alone. This time he is accompanied by TWO singers. I’m actually not sure which is which though. One’s name is J.D. Greer, who, if I had to guess, is the black one who sounds like a Mike Jackson knock off, and the other one is named Pleasure Ellis (Editor’s note: we’re not making this up.), who I think is the Jon B knock off. I don’t think he sounds anything like Jon B, but I just don’t know how else to describe Pleasure Ellis. Side note: I think the name Pleasure Ellis is hilarious. In fact, if I’m ever an R&B singer, I think I’ll call myself Gratification Johnson to copy his stee-lo.
And now…on to the foolishness.
The video takes place in a club where everyone dances in slow motion. Everyone, except for Hammer. Hammer dances to the beat of his own drummer, and that drummer is apparently on some pretty powerful drugs.
Things to watch for:
0:01 – Hammer decided to spell the title of the song “Get 2 NO U.” …Why?? Shout out to the Youtube person who spelled everything right…otherwise I would have never been able to find this song.
0:24 – Faux fur coat? Check! Slicked back hair? Check. Faded sideburns?! YOU KNOW IT! This is the introduction of the guy I want desperately to be Pleasure Ellis. He’s Hitting one of his many long and drawn out falsetto notes. They get more ridiculous as the song goes on.
0:44 – Awkward dance sequence between Hammer and his love interest. She’s trying to figure out how to dance with him…he’s trying to shake that fur loose off his back…and never the twain shall meet.
0:47 – Hammer says “She be rubbin’ my back, when I’m on my back.” I’m not sure what that means. I kind of think it means that Hammer freestyled this entire song, which is a bold move. However, if he purposefully wrote that lyric…WHAT THE HELL WAS HE TALKING ABOUT!?!
1:20 – Hammer shows us ‘All uh Dis’ that he uses when freakin’ down sexy girls. Kinda just looks like…wavey hands. So…if anyone was wondering…Hammer uses his hands when having sex. – REMOVE
1:47 – Hammer starts talking about.. praying? I think he was having trouble with his conscious after all the the old creepy uncle talk to the young lady and started talking about God. In my head, his wife walked in the room while he was recording this song and he was like, ‘Oh, hey honey! Uuuuuuh… I’m talkin’ about God on this track! Not no girl! Sexy…Sexy…God! And I want to get to know HIM! Heh heh…see!?!’
2:21 – J.D. Greer starts a trend of singing really loudly in girls faces. A trend that I intend to carry out in my everyday life.
2:39 -Pleasure Ellis over does everything and sings so loud in this girl’s face! He’s out of control!
2:51 -Yeeeeeeeessssssss! (c) Pleasure Ellis
3:00 -Everyone wants to leave, but Hammer keeps dancing and they can’t go until he finishes gyrating. That’s probably worse than having a friend who is too drunk to leave on their own.
3:39 – Pleasure Ellis tells the girl with the big forehead to walk on down a long dark hallway without him while turns and sings himself into everyone’s heart. And he sings….and he sings…and he yeeeeeeeeessss’s again (3:49) and he sings…and he sings…then at 4:11 he hits one of the worst falsetto notes I’ve ever heard. His finger points up…but his voice never quite gets there.
Nothing in this video ever quite gets there. Nothing does.
*Update: We did some research on Pleasure Ellis. Turns out he’s not the white guy in the fur coat, as we were hoping but… we’re gonna continue to pretend that he is anyway. Check out his video “Body Language” which… kind of sounds like “Get 2 NoU.”